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Secret Identity Crisis

There's a part of me in Paragon City, a part that most people don't know. What's killing me today is realizing that they never will. I have to give up hope that someday I'll get to bond with my kids over a supergroup concept that we then get to see in action. Or that I'll ever manage to convince my wife that the game has merits.

I haven't even told her yet about the November 30 shutdown. It's been a bit of a wedge in our marriage, to be brutally honest. She's never approved of it; I'd even say she thinks less of me for playing it. And so I just never talk about it with her at all. To tell her it's ending would just bring that difference between us into sharp focus. She doesn't understand it, and has never really wanted to try; now she'd have even less reason to. And I expect she would react with thinly veiled satisfaction, which I would resent. (In fact I probably already am, unfairly enough.) So for now, I'm just not explaining (to anyone in meatspace, really) why I've been more sullen and/or easily frustrated lately.

AAAnyway. The post linked below really crystallizes why I'm so upset about the killing of City of Heroes. There is nothing out there that can fill the space it will leave behind.

On the End of a World: http://markovia.com/?p=75

Comments

staxxy
Oct. 10th, 2012 04:37 am (UTC)
it's just killing me. I have no real idea where i am going to go next.